Don't Guess My Age!

OK, I have few illusions about myself. From looking in the mirror I am aware that I no longer look 30ish, though sometimes can pass for 40ish in the right blue jeans. I'm OK with it.

So today while out at a bar throwing darts with my husband, I met a nice younger man throwing on the next board and we started talking about our kids. Because he looks really young, the conversation turned to age. (He looks a good 5 years younger than his age.)

He turned to me and said, "I won't even try to guess your age. I'm not good at that."

I said, "Don't even try -- regardless it is a lose-lose situation for you."

I didn't explain it to him, but here are the facts. When you guess the age of a woman who is over 45, you can never win! Here's why.

If you guess too young, then the woman is offended thinking you are pitying her. (If she is smart she is offended. If her hair is bleached too blond and she wears Ugg boots, with a really short skirt, you are safe.)

If you guess too old, then she is mad because you think she is old. If you guess exactly right, well, that is bad, too. No woman ever wants to look her age.

The best thing is to do is what this guy did -- refuse to guess.

I never told him my age. Though people "say" I look younger than 49, and I probably do look younger than the average woman my age, I don't look remarkably younger and I was not fishing for a compliment. No sober person will ever mistaken me for 39 or less.

The truth is, I thought I was OK with it. I have never lied about my age and I have never felt the need to... until now. I think it was Gloria Swanson who said something like: if you add 10 years to your age, then everyone will marvel at how young you look.

Not a bad idea -- I look pretty damn good for 59!
__________

I could not find the exact Swanson quote I was looking for above, but I did find a couple of others that are interesting:

• "Because I take care of my body, it doesn't look like the body of a woman of my years."
• "I became a fanatic about healthy food in 1944."
• "I consider anybody who weighs over 200 pounds fat, and time was when I could not refrain from telling such people so." (Wow! Could you imagine being so bold?)
• "I entered the cosmetics industry because I wanted more women to use cosmetics made with safe, healthful ingredients."
• "Your body is the direct result of what you eat as well as what you don't eat. "