HOT FLASHES!

Argh!

My women friends have warned me that I would start to have hot flashes, I would have trouble sleeping and life could be hell for a while. Though I knew it was coming, and I've had an occasional light flash, I was not expecting what has started the last few weeks.

Not only have I not slept through the night in about a month, but in the last week I've been awake much more than I have slept. (My dogs being aggravating have not helped.)

To top it off, today while doing some light exercises, the hot flash that came over me made me feel nauseated. I thought I would toss my cookies all over my stability ball!

Now that it has finally started, it better pass quickly! A lack of sleep and an overheated me are NOT a good combination.

Oh, shoot! Here comes another one!
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Photo borrowed from http://alignpilates.com/tag/yoga-for-hot-flashes.

Note to Self

On days when there is no school, do not eat lunch at any restaurant that has a play land.

I need to clarify -- I like kids. Let me rephrase -- I like SOME kids. My kids are great! My nieces and nephews, kids of my friends -- all amazing! What I don't like are other people's kids who cry incessantly, run wild in a restaurant, don't know the meaning of the word "no", and scream. Yeah, screaming is bad. It's even worse when I'm on my lunch hour and I just want a nice quiet place to relax and read before going back to work.

What was I thinking when I made the decision to try Chick-fil-A today? Though I've had the opportunity to try the breaded sandwiches before, I have never actually eaten at one of the restaurants. I wanted to see how the grilled chicken sandwiches compare to others I've tried.

The first sign I should have paid attention to is that the parking lot was full. Second, I should have noticed the indoor play land. But I didn't.

The good news is, I really looked forward to going back to work this afternoon.
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Though the sandwich was OK, Wendy's grilled chicken is tastier and juicier and more expensive. Also, it was difficult to figure out the calorie count from the web site. It wasn't obvious which sandwich I had ordered just by reading the descriptions and I could not remember what it was called.

Still, I liked the options and might go back -- on a day when school is in session.

Why Peter Bogdanovich Did Not Hit on Me

A couple of friends and I had a great time at the Wexner Center Saturday night. Not only did we get to see What's Up Doc? on a big screen, but Peter Bogdanovich (the director) was there. Bogdanovich made a few comments before the showing, then stayed after the movie for a Q&A. We enjoyed the movie and his comments were very entertaining. It was a good evening!

While standing in line for the ladies room afterward, I overheard some conversations that made me chuckle. The first part involved a young blond who said loudly, "I wish he would write a book. I'd love to read all of those stories." Another woman around my age politely pointed out that he had written several, some for sale in the on site store. (In his introductory comments he mentioned five of them by title.)

After a few more not so bright comments about getting his autograph, forgetting she had a program and handing him a plain white envelope, she proudly and loudly said something to the effect: He is quite the dirty old man.

After telling the story to my husband, it occurred to me that Peter Bogdanovich would never hit on me. Here are just a few reasons:
1) The only artificial thing about me is my hair color and it is not blond.
2) A footnote to #1 -- I've had no surgical enhancements. (The blond in the bathroom could not say that.)
3) I'm over 25.
4) I didn't jump up and down and cheer excessively for him from the second row. (Yes, I think he saw you -- nearly everyone saw you.) He was good, but seriously, I'm not convinced he deserved the standing ovation.
5) I would never say something like: It's cool that he is still rocking those glasses!
6) I did not ask for his autograph. He was more than accessible, which is very cool, I'm just not enamored with famous people just because they are famous. Now, if I had read one of his books and enjoyed it, I would have been thrilled to have him autograph it.

I have no idea how much of this woman's description of events are exaggerated. For all I know, Bogdanovich was a perfect gentleman and she made the whole thing up.

Whether it is true or not, I can tell you from experience -- things like that NEVER happen to nearly-50-year-old-women who are not artificially enhanced and are somewhat bright.

Thank goodness!

Reverse the Effects of Aging...

... with the Neckline Slimmer. At least, the commercial I saw on TV says it will magically slim your neck.

For the amazing price of $19.99, plus shipping and handling, you will receive a little piece of plastic with a spring inside. All you have to do is put the piece of plastic under your chin and push down with your chin to magically get rid of a double chin and loose skin.

Not only is it not possible to spot lose weight, how dumb must people with double chins be to believe that they can reduce loose skin with exercise? (If you have ever watched The Biggest Loser, you know that exercise has no affect on loose skin!)

If you look closely at the before and after photos, those women will have the exact same result by just holding their chin up higher. In fact, I'm absolutely positive that is the only thing different in the photos.

Here are some things that affect whether you will get a double chin:
1) Your weight.
2) Genetics. (My mom and grandma both had double chins -- I'm predisposed!)
3) Posture.

So, what do you have to do to get rid of a double chin?
1) Exercise your entire body.
2) Lose weight, or better yet, don't become overweight to begin with.
3) Hold your head up.

If all of that fails, well then surgery is really your only option.

Ma'am Update

Excerpted from Wikipedia:

Ma'am literally signifies "my lady."

Usage of "Ma'am" is common in the United States and in Western Canada. In the past the term was in theory to be used only for married women, but it has become common courtesy to use this term for all adult women, rather than to attempt to presume a marital status based on age or other appearances. The term formerly in common usage for unmarried women, "Miss," is now usually reserved only for children and young ladies of school age, for extremely formal usage in which the woman's marital status is known, or if the woman in question has made it known that that she prefers said term.

Miss, Ma'am or Young Lady?

On my 30th birthday, I was called "ma'am" for the first time ever by a really nice, polite young man. I freaked, overreacted, and said loudly, "Don't you ever call me that again!" (I may have shouted.)

Since then I have accepted the fact that many polite people call women ma'am. I'm OK with it.

Today at lunch the waiter called me "miss." I flinched. No, it isn't bad to be called miss when you are under 30, but at nearly 50? I kinda felt insulted, though I wasn't really sure why. I understand why more and more service staff are hesitant to use ma'am, but miss made me feel old. It felt like he was saying, "I know ma'am is upsetting to people your age, so I'll be safe with miss."

The good thing is he didn't call me "young lady." Yeah, this one is the worst. Once waiters start calling a woman "young lady," it means you are so damn old they think you are too stupid to realize you are really being called old. I don't know many 80-year-olds who are fooled by this. And have you noticed, it is almost always an overly friendly male waiter who does this? I don't recall a woman ever calling another woman young lady, unless she truly was a young lady.

It is all very confusing. Men have it much easier. If a man is called "sir," it is a sign of respect -- it has nothing to do with age, marital status or anything else. (I have occasionally heard "sir"used sarcastically, but that is another issue.)

Knowing my obsession with my age, my friends did notice that the waiter called me miss. The consensus among them (besides the fact I'm overly sensitive) was that "miss" was better than "ma'am." Of course, they are all much younger than I am (other than Gary).

And I discovered they are right. According to an informal poll of women I know over the age of 40: miss is better than ma'am. One even threw in "my lady" as her preference. I LOVE that! But how on earth do you tell a waiter, "Please don't call me miss, I prefer (dramatic pause) my lady."

Regardless, I'm glad I'm not in a profession where I have to choose the least offensive way to address adult female patrons. So, I'll just give all of those people in service industries a break. Their jobs are hard enough without people like me over-reacting to being addressed politely.

Four Things

I successfully did four things recently to help keep my New Year's Resolutions:

1. Had my hair colored and cut and told my great hair guy he is one of my resolutions. Though he jokingly said I never looked like a skunk, anyone who has roots as white as mine knows that was a lie of kindness.
2. Bought a pair of pants that fit. The good news is, they are a size smaller than the last pair I bought! I have not made any progress on my planned weight loss, which is part of the reason I have put off buying new clothes. Just in case those 10 lbs. are with me forever, I now have one pair of dress pants that fit.
3. Bought a new scale. Though not listed specifically, having a scale that will be somewhat accurate will assist with letting me know if I ever do lose weight. (Our previous scale is so inaccurate, I can step on the scale, step off, step right back on, and the numbers can differ by as much as 3 to 5 lbs.!)
4. I've been taking calcium every day. Again, not spelled out specifically, but it is really important for women my age. I have several bottles of calcium in my cupboard that I have never taken because the chewables are chalky and make me gag and the capsules are so huge, I cannot swallow them with a glass of water. I opted to buy a brand new package of caramel flavored soft chews which are a lot more expensive, but I've been taking them every day.
   

Changing a habit takes at least 21 days. I'm on my way!